You Never Actually Change…You Become What You’ve Always Been


I have never been much of a believer when it comes to the concept of ‘destiny’.

Even now, I vehemently oppose the idea that our life has already been predetermined by things beyond our control.

But for a while now, I have had a realization that things aren’t always what they seem. While I still believe in the idea that we have the power to choose our lives, I think that there might just be a small element of destiny at play as well.


To begin with, I don’t imply by the word ‘destiny’ that our lives are a fixed story where there is no such thing as free will.

No, my idea of ‘destiny’ has nothing to do with superstitious voodoo nonsense. I still believe in free will and that our lives are pretty much ours to do with as we please.

I realized this when I began to take a casual look at my life and how I had changed over the years.


When I did this, what I realized is that I never truly changed beyond my habits and outlook on life.

In other words, I have the same set of hobbies, passions, interests, likes, dislikes, proclivities and so on that I did five, ten and even fifteen years ago!

These are things that I never actively bothered to work towards and focus on; on the contrary, I just did whatever I was instinctively attracted and drawn towards.

I’ll give you a more detailed explanation of what I mean. Here are a list of things that have never changed about me:

  • I am a perfectionist.
  • I am a bit more on the carefree and happy-go-lucky side.
  • I am a rebel.
  • I am an emotional person. [Problem fixed through free will.]
  • I am a night owl; in other words, my productivity is the highest during the night.
  • I am socially insensitive and often offensive [Problem fixed through free will.]
  • I don’t care about conforming to mainstream dogmas regarding politics, religion, etc.
  • I don’t care about social norms and taboos.
  • I forgive people too easily. [Problem fixed through free will.]
  • I get attached to people too quickly. [Problem fixed through free will.]
  • I hate being too social.
  • I hate schedules.
  • I hate monotony.
  • I hate rules.
  • I hate conformity.
  • I hate the herd mentality.
  • I hate pretentious sophistication.
  • I hate rigid dress codes.
  • I hate early bedtimes. [Problem fixed through free will.]
  • I hate waking up early. [Problem fixed through free will.]
  • I hate sunny days.
  • I have a hard time moving on. [Problem fixed through free will.]
  • I love to travel and be a wanderer.
  • I love cloudy days.
  • I love the rain.
  • I love misty or foggy mornings.
  • I procrastinate…a lot!
  • I love creativity.
  • I seek the approval of others. [Problem fixed through free will.]
  • I tend to become pessimistic too easily. [Problem fixed through free will.]
  • I tend to lean on the introversion side. [Problem fixed through free will.]
  • I tend to trust people too easily. [Problem fixed through free will.]
  • I value time being alone.
  • Well, you get the idea…

The thing is, I’ve not changed at all in terms of who I truly am; I’m still the same person I’ve always been.

Also, all of this is despite the changes that have taken place in my life regarding environment, friends, social circles, circumstances and so on. You can read more about this in another post, where I have explained my views on the whole ‘nature vs. nurture’ debate.


These observations have made me realize that while we certainly have free will, there exists a certain state of existence uniquely suited for us where we would feel the most comfortable in.

It might take some time to analyze and understand but if you search hard enough, you can find out the exact lifestyle that works for you. It may sound hard to believe but it’s true.

Furthermore, this has nothing to do with superstition. It has it’s basis in genetics, with each of us having a unique set of genes that sets us apart from everyone else. It isn’t destiny but something quite close to it.


So how do you figure out what is your ideal state of existence?

To do this, you’ll need to go back to your childhood to find out what hasn’t changed. Also, you’ll need to take a closer look at your own life and find out what your unique set of likes and dislikes are.

Be honest and make a list of the whole thing. If you do it right, you’ll figure out the exact kind of person that you were meant to be.


In all,

Understand that you are completely free to live the life you want. It’s entirely your choice and you can do with it as you please.

However, also know that there is a unique state of existence that you would feel most suited and at home in, due to your genetics.

If you can just live a life that is the most congruent to your genes, you’ll be able to boost your satisfaction in life to the highest level possible.

(Visited 1 times, 1 visits today)
Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!